Whither thou Patriots?

Casa M is still reeling from the big loss Sunday night. I might have to stop hosting Super Bowl parties (which I love doing, incidentally, and I love the food, the game, and the commercials - usually) if only because if the Patriots are involved, my husband generally ignores our guests. But I digress.

What the H-E-doublehockeysticks happened?

A few theories from Big Orange Amy:

1) Too relaxed. Too confident. Too ready. Too optimistic. (That’s four-in-one, for those of you keeping track.) Over the last few years, the Patriots have gone from lovable-loser-underdogs to 12-point favorites (or more, during the early part of the season). Talk is cheap, regardless of which side of the point spread you’re on.

2) The O Line figured the big, ol’ slugs across the ball wouldn’t really try and grab Brady’s much-discussed ankle. Or his arm. Or his waist. Or any other part of the Stetson Man. They.were.wrong. And they all paid for it. For 2 weeks, I questioned the durability of the Rocking Chair Crew (Seau, Bruschi, and Vrable, the elder statesmen/linebackers), thinking they couldn’t keep up on the other side. I never once thought twice about the offensive line, and apparently I wasn’t the only one. Wow. Talk about a breakdown in communication/ability/preparation.

3) Spygate Karma. There, I said it. For over 20 weeks, we’ve been hearing about the tale of the tape, Belicheck’s smarmy ways of finding out other teams’ signals, Roger Goodell’s destruction of said tapes, taping of the Rams red-zone walk-through before the Patriots’ Super Bowl win back in ‘02, and most recently, Sen. Arlen Specter and his desire to be a butt-insky in the matter. There’s been Patriots push-back for some time now, and I’m not surprised that the outcome of the Super Bowl has seemingly ebbed the tide of all this “Spygate” talk. I guess when you get yours in the end, people stop kicking your name around. [Or else the Senate will wait until Mr. 'I never did steroids' Clemens leaves Cap Hill to start talking about it again.] I’m not saying I agree, I’m just throwing it out there.

Thoughts? Opinions?

Oh right, the Super Bowl’s a-comin’

I’m not working this week, but you’d think with so much time on my hands that I’d be blogging up a storm. Unfortunately, I write better when I’m stressed-out, busier than ever, etc., and this just hasn’t been the case. Oh sure, things are going on, but nothing I would really want to discuss here on a blog that’s more sports-oriented than anything else.

So there’s this little football game on Sunday night, you may have heard of it. I think they call it the “Super Bowl.” Something like that. The only reason I know anything about it is that my husband is completely out of his mind when it comes to coverage of the New England Patriots, and word on the street is that they’re playing in this Super Bowl-thing come Sunday. Since he’s been bored at work lately, he’s seen every article, editorial, video clip, and spoof on his vaunted Pats, and proceeds to “fill me in” when he gets home late in the day. As if I care anymore. For the first week I would just shake my head and say, “You know Hon, folks used to like those lovable loser Pats. Now though, you’re getting too big for your britches and frankly, you’re becoming annoying. Tone it down. You’re not on the team.”

I guess that didn’t help. This past week, I’ve merely been shaking my head and saying, “Okay, honey.” With a “Whatever” under my breath. Enough already. I think I disappointed him yesterday when I didn’t read a front-page ESPN article on the dude behind the success of the Patriots. Oh well. I love my husband, but I don’t feel the need to read every word written on the undefeated footballers.

So anyway, here’s the problem though: I still think the Patriots will win. I’ll never hear the end of it if they do, but I still think they’re too much for the New York Giants. I frankly don’t think Eli can keep up with the pressure, regardless of his resurgence in the playoffs.

My prediction: Patriots 31, Giants 17

Because I have opinions and you’re entitled to them

A few thoughts on the sports world this week:

1) Dear Tony Romo, The only one who cares whether or not you dumped J.Simp is T.O., and that’s because he’s your teammate. You’re his quarterback. Yo, you don’t think he did all that cryin’ for nothing do ya? And frankly, while I would hate to defend you (at any point, regardless of how your team did in the playoffs), you had no other option but to dump her: what were you going to do, stand up to Dallas fans everywhere who thought she was destroying Big D week after week with her jersey-flaunting appearance in the luxury box? Sorry bro, but you don’t have the cajones, and that’s okay. You probably did what was best in order to salvage whatever relationship you have left with the rest of your teammates. Speaking of the Cowboys, you might enjoy this hilarious video sent to me by none other than Ghost of Neyland from over you-know-where (NSFW).

2) Enough already with the friggin’ Patriots in the friggin’ Super Bowl. [This is more for my husband than for anyone else.] Good grief, y’all. You’d think they’d never won a game, let alone a Super Bowl before. Between Sunday evening and Monday evening, I think I watched NFL Prime Time (or whatever they call the show with Boomer, et al) about 8 times. Of course that’s because I let my husband have possession of the remote control, but seeing as though “One Tree Hill” wasn’t on, I guess I just lost myself in a game of Peggle and (tried to) ignore it. It’s not as if I somehow want the Giants to win, it’s just that I’m tired of hearing every single story that ESPN runs about the vaunted New England Patriots. I get it. You’re good. Now I know how the rest of the country was feeling as the wins racked up. Sheesh.

3) Please Jose Canseco, for the love of all that is good and holy: SHUT UP. Leave my Mags alone.  Who would make a movie with you anyway? Your friends from The Surreal Life?

4) We got a Nintendo Wii today and I already need an MRI on my right shoulder. Granted, I fell on it 2 years ago and my doctor in CT never believed that I was in SEVERE pain, and yes, the pain does come and go on a whim, but God almighty, Wii tennis is fun. [That had to be the longest, stupidest run-on sentence in the history of the written word.] I don’t care if my right arm falls off, I won’t stop. I’m getting my chukkas handed to me in the points race, but at least I’m winning at bowling. That counts for something, right? Guess that’s the Midwesterner in me coming out. Once I figure out baseball, IT’S ON.

5) My last day at my LAST temp job is tomorrow (Friday) and I couldn’t be more excited. I won’t be able to carry my files back to the file room (see #4, above), but who the heck cares. No more bank (I’ll say what I’m really feeling here, NSFW or anywhere near small, impressionable children), no more Crazy Wendy, and no more half-hour lunch breaks. A gal like me needs a full 60 minutes. Because like the Patriots, I play all 60. (Sorry, couldn’t resist). An update on future employment opportunities will follow.

Happy (almost) Weekend!

Top 5!

1. The UT men’s and women’s basketball teams are in the Top 5 in the nation. This is progress, my friends, no matter how you slice it. Go Big Orange!
2. The Patriots and Giants are going to the Super Bowl. I was disappointed in the Packers, but I think I’ll survive somehow, seeing as though I despise the Giants. I am so glad to be out of Connecticut.

3. Philip Rivers had surgery to remove damaged cartilige in his knee the week before the AFC Championship game. Holy bloody sock, Batman! Don’t make me start liking the guy! What happened to L.T.?

4. ESPN keeps re-running NFL Prime Time or whatever their NFL highlights show is called. I think I have easily seen the Patriots and Giants replays twenty times between last night and tonight. Ugh. Enough already. Let’s just talk about the upcoming football ads and what I’ll be making for the Super Bowl party.

5. This is totally not sports-related, but I’m not even sure I could drink S’More flavored Schnapps, no matter how hillbilly I am.

Spamalot

It appears that I’ve started getting a little spam here on Big Orange Fever, and in an effort to quell the b.s. that is seen by everyone else, I’m going to have to turn comment moderation on.

Free speech? What free speech. Freedom isn’t free.

Armageddon must be near

I just returned from an appointment and as I walked into the living room, The Husband pressed “play” on the DVR and there was Terrell Owens, face covered in big sunglasses, invoking the name of God. Then, moment later, he CRIES. I started backing away from the television very slowly, as if to prepare myself for the lightning bolts that I was sure were about to strike Owens where he stood.

So I went to YouTube and tried to find a clip of the press conference, to have around for those moments when I get down in the dumps, or need a quick pick-me-up. Having typed in “Terrell Owens cries” YouTube tried correcting me by asking if I meant “Terrell Owens tries.” That alone is hilarious considering I’m not altogether sure Terrell Owens really tries too hard, though now he’s got until next summer to find his (new) motivation. Maybe God can give him a hand.

Or maybe he just needs to go on vacation with Tony Romo and Jessica.

Oh wait, that’s his teammate. And pinning the loss on Tony Romo’s love life is unfair.

God, I love football. And T.O. loves God. Who knew?

I know, I know

I’m a bigtime slacker who hasn’t posted anything all week long. Forgive me, dear friends, for having a hellish week at work and nothing else pertinent to say in the meantime in between time.

But, news around the world still exists, so here we go:

1) Kristen, et al from MommyNeedsACocktail.com is currently hob-nobbing with celebs in L.A. in preparation for the (now Press Conference’d) Golden Globes this weekend. Check out the new storefront at BabyBrewing to get your hilarious t-shirts.

2) Sports announcers STILL don’t know how to pronounce the name of the Jacksonville NFL team.  It’s the Jag-WARS, not the Jag-WIRES. I don’t expect folks to say it like the Brits do on the radio commercials here where I live (Jag-you-ars), but I do expect the so-called professionals that they are to be able to pronounce it semi-appropriately. Argh!

3) I started a new blog tonight. Don’t worry, I’m keeping the sports-related rants here on Big Orange Fever and will put all other life-themed rants over at Put Me In Parentheses.  I imagine there will be (vastly) different audiences for each blog, and that’s perfectly fine.

4) The Vols (finally) hired a new Offensive Coordinator. I’m just happy to have the search behind us so we can move on to recruiting us a dope class of athletes. [Maybe "dope" was an inappropriate word choice there; I would prefer that our students not have life-altering problems with dope.]

5) I am sure there is more I’m missing (O.J. got in trouble again, and Marion Jones is going to jail, right?) but I’ll have to get caught up later. I promise. Swear. Cross my heart and hope to spit.